Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
Someone's vagina was extra sandy cause the left side of my bed feels like the beach.
I told a 250 pound football player I would catch him if he jumped into my arms. And that is how I broke my wrist
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize