we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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