Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
So I woke up today with someone's door knob in my pocket. I hope everbody else got out of the house ok.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Does taking an old homeless guy to the strip club, buying him lap dances, and calling him pops all night count as a good deed???
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
Fair warning: I will be throwing corn dogs at you every time I see you this week.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
I woke up with a treasure map drawn on my ass. Whattt.
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
