Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
its not facebook stalking, its market reasearch
I just saw on the news, this guy tried to smuggle coke in a bouquet of roses... and to think I used to hate valentines day.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Well after last night I am convinced he is real life Tyler Durden. He only exists to me and somehow keeps me out of jail this entire time
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
On this version of “Dean Can’t Be a Normal Fucking Human,” I told a guy I’d shove a tv up his ass. Recreationally.
Plasma, LED or OLED?
Randomize
