4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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