I just encouraged Kelsey to make out with some guy for beer so I could take one, does this make me a pimp?
By definition I think it does.
So this is what it feels like to be all that is man.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
admittedly, geting that drunk in front of my last two exes wasnt a good idea
probably didn't help that you cheated on them with each other either
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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