tell her no need for introductions. and that you've read about her on the back of toilet doors.
Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I CAN MOONWALK!
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
And my parents said I crawled through the house
In retrospect i can confidently say that the last two months of our relationship... i was only in it because i didnt wanna lose my list on his netflix account.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
Randomize
