They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
last night i found out that my 11 year old cousin used me as an example of what not to do in her D.A.R.E. speech. awesome.
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
I learned three things this morning. Don't get out of my car without my keys, don't let a girl paint my nail unless I'm getting laid by said girl, and lastly I learned how to break into my own car.
Randomize
