My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
is there a way to sugar-coat "shes in jail" when someone is texting me asking where their friend is?
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
I believe in using alcohol to heal from the inside. Not as a topical solution.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
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