I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
They walked in to the store, ripped up the phone book, and left. Can we get on their level?
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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