I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
I feel like we need to find him and explain that if the two of them would just fuck he'd understand.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
You left me a really long voicemail saying, "Hey, it's meeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee." and then the rest is just loud laughter
Randomize
