My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Today's hangover is a "wear sunglasses while pooping in the dark" kind of day
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
He wanted to watch the vow, cuddle, and not have sex. An upgrade is in order.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Got caught up in a real life love triangle. Both guys wanted me. I'm tempted to just run off with the cute girl from McDonalds instead
Please do that
Randomize
