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• (313): View more from Michigan

  thanks...oh and i got my period

  (734): View more from Michigan

  told you

  (313): View more from Michigan

  oh hush

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• (419): View more from Ohio

  Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.

  (708): View more from Illinois

  We need to hang out more often

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• (480): View more from Arizona

  I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.

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• (619): View more from California

  Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.

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• (613): View more from Ontario

  The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame

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• (360): View more from Washington

  Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up

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• (407): View more from Florida

  Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart

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• (952): View more from Minnesota

  Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.

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• (504): View more from Louisiana

  I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.

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• (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.

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• (207): View more from Maine

  One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live

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• (678): View more from Georgia

  If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.

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• (870): View more from Arkansas

  There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.

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