My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
You chanted SOFA PIZZA all night then we woke up to find about ten slices under the cushions where you were sleeping....
I have the perfect view of a sexy blonde in yoga pants stretching from the shoulder press machine. I'll be here all night. So glad I came high.
Ur here with me in spirit. Now run free. Run free
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
No one's ever called me intergalactic cocksucker, before.
What does it say about me that I feel completely charmed right now?
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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