ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Drinking wine from a straw at 6:15 in the morning. This is what college does to people.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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