Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
If you're knocked up, we're telling everyone it's mine and that the power of our love overcame the inherent reproductive limitations of two vhagines.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
I'm pretty sure we scarred one of our coworkers. This is the second time he has caught us both fully undressed and banging at work.
Either he has bad timing or he wants to join.
Hey, I told her the bathroom was a "No fly zone" after I used it. She willingly allowed her nose to go through that pain. It's her fault, she only supplied me with vodka when she knows I only drink rum.
You were cuddling with an eight iron and I was eating a fajita completely ignoring your presence.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
Randomize
