Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
you announced to everyone at the bar "fuck girls. they're confusing. im gonna start having sex with boys now"
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
Who was the girl that woke me up at 4am to tell me "there's an emergency, we need you to come smoke weed"
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
He ate me out while I was playing bejeweled. It was the greatest moment of my life.
Randomize
