Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
6 figure salary? he just got a little cuter.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
I was floored. Like way less concerned with him using drugs than I am with him not believing in evolution.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
