This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
I thought I was invisible, then some guy flashed his high beams at me and I realized my lights weren't on...not invisible.
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Nothing like having a family watch you dry heave at the end of the dock
Randomize