So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
beer pong: waldo and ernie vs. bacon and eggs... i love halloween
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
