trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
Randomize
