Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
But theres a keg here and me gusta
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I try not to flex my sex appeal too much around the engineers, it's like feeding bears...always ends in disaster.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I snuck in through the doggy door to get his vodka. Do you think my ex will know?
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I'm both gender and math confused
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
Randomize
