Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
You were dancing with his friend and you stopped to literally push the girl he was dancing with out of the way to make out with him
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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