What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
He's at the gym. He likes to get high and swim cause it makes him feel like a fish.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Had a booty call cancel on me tonight. Said he hurt his back. So this is what single and 30-something is like. Suck.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Yeah man i woke up and only had a Jimmy John's wrapper covering myself..
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
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