Sober January is a disaster.
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
he fucked my hip out of place.
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I can feel the judgmental stares of Christians from around the world right now.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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