i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
its not thanksgiving till you and grandpa shotgun beers out in the shed, and lose
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
nothin like your phone freezing up and sending out old booty calls at 11am on a sunday. fml.
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
