In honor of tonight, my penis will make an appearance
Note to self: soco dudes get amusinly uncomfotable when I moan at the urinal.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
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