I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
It's a 2 hour train ride a 7 in the morning, of course we're bringing alcohol
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Yeah! Don't let me leave the house without marijuana and a juicer.
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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