yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
Do you remember that time on the drunk bus when I kept thanking the bus driver for serving our country?
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
First table when you walk in. Can't miss us. I'm wearing a feather boa and a green hat
You had me at first table
Just got smoked out by my boss. Working in politics is great.
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
It was sweet, he carried me out of my bathroom after I passed out, built me a pillow fort so I wouldn't roll out of bed, set a glass of water on the table, and brought me a mixing bowl to puke in. Totally a sign we're more than just fuckbuddies.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
Randomize
