there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
I heard a loud ass thump and then I saw both dogs coming around the corner.... Without him. I went to check out what happened and the dogs apparently pulled him down onto his face, knocking him out.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
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