so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
Having sex with her was like reading the Wall Street Journal.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
I accidentally put Bacardi in my coffee this morning. I ain't even mad.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
