i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Things in my bed this morning: a Waffle House hat, a finding nemo DVD, sharpies, my graduation robes and an adult diaper. Did we play drunk scavenger hunt again?
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
We're like a married couple, but we only have sex on college holidays and other people's birthdays.
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
