she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
Standing here next to my mom talking to my friend trying to act like he doesn't sell me E every weekend.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
Porch rule of tonight: when you sing, you must use "something" as a microphone. The person to use the most "creative" object gets the door prize...so far Stephie is winning with Jennifer's dog.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
I did a hand stand against the glass wall at Ziggy's with no panties on and got 3 phone numbers. Thank God I shaved this morning...
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
well a fat roach just fell out of my hair. so there's that
So apparently it wasn't anything really bad, it's hemorrhoids. Which is the medical word for butthurt. I actually have ass ointment.
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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