he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Should I tell him the real reason I was in the hospital, or should I just keep him thinking the side effect he thought was in for was allergy related, not I just miscarried the child I didn't know we were having?
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
Randomize
