ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Jesus Christ. Even your cock has to be an overachiever. :-(
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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