the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
waiting in line for my ID. the kid in front of me reaks of hopes and dreams and hornyness-- freshmen by calvin klein
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
I sleep texted my mom and asked her for a condom last night
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize