It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I've woke up in his bed 4 out of the past 6 mornings. I feel like this might be the time to learn more about him then his first name and what kind of beer he drinks.
I just wrote "where Jason is" on the screen. He guessed "hospital" correctly.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize
