i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
Operation Purity has been aborted
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
she acted like she'd never seen someone do speed off of a desk with a rolled up receipt. and she calls herself a grad student.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
There's a cop, a pizza guy and a half naked girl outside along with a dog that I don't know. It feels like I walked into a Judd Apatow movie.
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize
