remember facepaint boy? turns out it stains. aaaand i have it all over my face and neck.
We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
You drunk yet?
Nope. Give me two hours then delete my texts before you read them.
Cant make any promises.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Her new crush is a 6'2" guacamole baron that may also be a Jedi.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
Randomize
