Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
operation harelip BJ is a go
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
he's drinking at 8 in the morning. it's going to be one of those "or else the terrorists have won" kinda days
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
Today's face brought to you by last night's make-up.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Her mom caught her drunk streaking when she was 12. Of course she's perfect for me.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Ugh. I need to go to the store, but I'm too lazy. Whatever shall I do? That girls still passed out. I should steal her car
Randomize
