Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Someone broke into my car and stole it then left me $300 to pay for the damages with a lovely note that said "we just couldn't pass up the boxed wine... Sorry about the window."
My philosophy is thug life and that means never having to say your sorry for stealing drinks off tables
Also I'm sorry for asking you to shave my vagina for me last night
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
Randomize
