I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
You know it's been a rough year when your therapist mouth is just wide open. And I didn't even get to the real issue!
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
