If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
I totally intended to come to the hotel, but I woke up in a parking lot
The struggle is real.
WE'RE NOT MAKING A DICK PIZZA OKAY
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
I've given up on the male species, I'm just going to be a lonely whore for the rest of my life.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
totally just bought a bottle of gin with nothing but change
don't ever let anyone tell you that youre not 100% class
I'm at the fucking ritz Carlton and I would leave here to cuddle with her. Not even fuck, just cuddle. What th hell is wrong with me?
I think it's called love, bro
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
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