He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
It's just like the Real World with babies
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
we just ate hash browns in a nativity scene with baby jesus
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
I did what i always do when i miss him; masturbate and watch Bridges of Madison County.
Randomize
