Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Yeah. 11 people shoved in a clown car for a 1 hour party. I'm too old for house parties.
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
