We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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