Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
I just learned a new drink. Sloppy Ninja. Half Saki Half Nyquil
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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