I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Randomize