Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
It was a deal breaker when she told me not to wear a condom and god would decide if we were meant to be together.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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