How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
Randomize
