Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Heb just said, and I quote, "let's go to Who's On Third and fuck a fishbowl with our mouths. I am going to fuck this van." and then he humped a van.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
You know you are high when you are so glad it wasn't your freshly buttered raisin bread that fell on your foot. It was your $400 Ipod
I asked him to help me break in the space ship aka my bed.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
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